top of page

Accept you don’t know the way and you might just find your direction.

When I bought this print in Brighton, about three years ago, it caused a real disagreement with my husband as to where it could hang. Indeed, if it could be hung anywhere in the house at all!

You see, my husband is an incredibly goal-driven person. It’s how he manages to be hugely respected in his work, train for international triathlons and still be around for the family. He sets himself targets and moves determinedly towards them, fitting more into a week than many people would in a month.

Therefore, the whole concept of not knowing where you’re going but going anywhere, to him, signified aimless drifting.

And I get it. I really do. But at that particular point in time, I wasn’t quite sure where I was going, so this struck a chord with me. It seemed to say it’s OK to not know the ultimate destination, you’re still moving forward, you can still enjoy the journey and keep growing as you go. Just keep moving.

Please don’t get me wrong, I am all for goal-setting; goals drive behaviour. However, I am aware, from talking to many people that, if we don’t have a personal goal or passion, we can sometimes become straight-jacketed by the idea that we should have one and are therefore gripped by the inertia that comes with feeling like we’re lacking in some way.

However, once you realise it’s OK to just ‘be’, that it’s OK not to know where you’re going, but focus on being present, it can be incredibly liberating. It actually gives your mind permission to stop worrying about it and to start feeling, experiencing life with no judgement and that is what opens you up to all sorts of possibilities.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase"

Martin Luther King

The key thing is to be aware of the journey, to be aware of whether you are living based on conscious thought or just following an old routine. As JRR Tolkein said, "Not all those who wander are lost".

We need to ask ourselves if we are stuck in an unhelpful pattern, repeating the same things over and over. Have we lived a hundred days or have we lived the same day a hundred times?

When I run Vision Board workshops, one of the most powerful things for me is to see people taking time to think about what they want to be, do and have in their lives. For some, they may decide to follow a huge dream or to buy the expensive car they’ve always admired. For others, it may be to have calm in their lives, to spend more time in nature or with their family. Once they’ve worked that out, setting their intentions and their goals comes much easier. And, don’t forget,

"Intention is not about absolute certainty. It’s about allowing and evolving."

Christine Kane

So where is the print now you might ask? Well, whilst I was determined to have it out somewhere, I agreed that it didn’t need to be front and centre, especially as, having embraced the freedom that came with allowing myself to not know where I was going, I now had a plan. So it lives on the lower shelf of the console table in our dining room. Hubby doesn’t notice it but I enjoy getting glimpses… and ultimately he did come with me.

This article was first published in The Coach Space



bottom of page